Mandy Baker Johnson

Living without Shadows


Almost seventeen years ago, Adi and I entered a covenant of marriage. We made each other promises in our wedding vows that we would stick together through tough patches and good times. We’ve certainly had some moments together….

Redundancy followed by six years of Adi self-contracting meant times of being quite well off followed by very lean months when food got more and more boring.

Being told we were physically unable to have a baby of our own, going through a failed IVF cycle and losing our tiny twins. That was tough.

My being ill for more than a year with cerebellar ataxia and ME/chronic fatigue.

Then there are the little things that annoy. For instance, I like the air con blowing warm air on my feet in winter in the car. Adi prefers it blowing on his face.

Yes, there have been times when thoughts of divorce have crossed our minds. We’d hardly be human if they hadn’t. But we don’t entertain those thoughts. We made promises and are committed to keeping them. That brings each of us a deep sense of security. We know that neither one of us is going to walk out of this marriage lightly. We work at spending time together, listening to one another, talking things through and just enjoying each other’s company. It doesn’t just happen and it would be easy to drift apart – Adi to his computer, me to my books.

Marriage is meant to be a picture of our relationship with God. He has made a covenant with us that if we trust in Jesus’ death and resurrection, He will be our God and we will be His people. This means He is utterly committed to us. We have to work at our relationship with God, making sure we spend quality time regularly with Him, and growing in our love for Him. But He is crazy about us and delights in being with and knowing us. God will never walk away from a relationship with us. This covenant is binding and will last for ever.



  1. What a lovely post. We do have to work at our relationship with God. I know I often take Him for granted. Thank you for this reminder.

  2. I love this celebration of love and loss and the covenant of marriage and relationship with God. it’s really spoken to me today. thanks.

    Glad I found you through christian bloggers fb group.
    If you’d like to link this at #TreasuredMoments you’d be very welcome

    • Mandy

      24/02/2016 at 3:31 pm

      Thanks Emma, I’m glad you were encouraged. I’ll take a look at Treasured Moments as I’m happy to participate in link-ups. Have a great day x

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